Normally, when a movie is really bad, the best part of watching the film is watching the previews. When watching The Mummy, Stephen Sommers "not-quite-a-remake-but-really-is" of the 1921 version, I didn't even get that satisfaction. I think one of the previews was good, but not good enough for me to remember its title. I remember that Jan de Bont is coming out with a new chic horror film called The Haunting or something equally cheesy, which looks to be worse than his last one. I also remember seeing a preview for a new Arnold Schwarzenegger movie that didn't even dare put his name on it after him having been in the double-trouble combination of Eraser and Jingle all the Way.
So, when the movie was as bad as the previews, I was not a happy camper.
No, to dispel a rumor it is not a remake of the 1921 film with the same plot, same title, and same main idea. To those people in charge of movie studios who are telling me this, I ask you: what is it?
Going on with my ripping the film to shreds, I will say that it has as cheesy of a plot as The Mummy (no matter what year) has ever had: "it" boy Brendon Fraser (portraying a French Legion Soldier who happens to be an American) has to save the world with British-thief Jonathan (John Hannah, hopefully no relation to the talented actress Daryl) and more-frigid-than-Antarctica archeologist/librarian Evelyn (Rachel Weisz) have to save the world from a very dumb, very ugly "mummy" (although he ends up with a fairly good complexion and a full bunch of skin before he is killed), played by Arnold Vosloo.
To all of these people I say this: is this the best you could do?
Let's face it, every time that Brendan Fraser tries to do a mainstream role he either fails miserably or pseudo-fails. In George of the Jungle, which I will only now admit to seeing, he made something that was already stupid look dumber. In Blast from the Past, a mediocre movie due to its script, he almost took a wrecking ball to it.
Vosloo and Hannah are people that I've seen before but haven't remembered enough of to pay attention. Stephen Sommers is someone who continues to be a thorn in my side after killing two Mark Twain books and then coming out with Deep Rising.
Sommers' very own tailor made script shows that people should not buy books on "How to Write your Screenplay in 21 Days" or "How to Make a Movie that Sells" on a matter of principle. Sommers tries and fails at juggling Adventure, Romance, Comedy, Action, and Horror around all at once. In the desperate attempt to keep the balls from hitting him on the head, he ends up placing one-liners right next to screams of terror as a flesh-eating... BEETLE?... devours someone from the inside. Also we get to see Rachel Weisz go from sub-zero to just plain zero as she "warms up" to Brendan Fraser.
This is a film at which I took my own advice. My advice: always get a head start on an angry mob. Hence, I watched the last thirty seconds from the back of the theatre.
As promised by the preview for The Mummy, the special effects are good. They are not, however, anything compared to what we normally see in the pre-summer gameshow. And, when I say special effects are good, you know what that normally means... It did also live up to its tagline, but not in the way intended. Let me tell you, personally, BEWARE OF THE MUMMY.
Mummy dearest.
See Also
Tuesday, 1 July 2008
The Mummy - 7/8/2008
Thursday, 19 June 2008
Erroll Garner
Artist: Erroll Garner
Genre(s):
Jazz
Other
Discography:
The Erroll Garner Collection
Year: 2007
Tracks: 20
Immortal Concerts
Year: 2007
Tracks: 18
Jazz Piano Masters CD 2 - Poor Butterfly
Year: 2006
Tracks: 19
Jazz Piano Masters CD 1 - Bouncin' With Me
Year: 2006
Tracks: 20
Honeysuckle Rose CD 4
Year: 2006
Tracks: 19
Honeysuckle Rose CD 3
Year: 2006
Tracks: 17
Honeysuckle Rose CD 2
Year: 2006
Tracks: 18
Honeysuckle Rose CD 1
Year: 2006
Tracks: 19
Plays misty
Year: 2003
Tracks: 10
Play Piano Play
Year: 1999
Tracks: 14
Magician and Gershwin and Kern
Year: 1995
Tracks: 22
The Essence Of Erroll Garner
Year: 1994
Tracks: 12
Jazz Masters 7
Year: 1994
Tracks: 15
Serenade To Laura
Year: 1993
Tracks: 14
The Original Misty
Year: 1988
Tracks: 13
Long Ago And Far Away
Year: 1988
Tracks: 16
Compact Jazz
Year: 1987
Tracks: 14
Campus Concert/Feeling Is Believing
Year: 1970
Tracks: 18
Soliloquy
Year: 1957
Tracks: 12
Contrasts
Year: 1954
Tracks: 13
Afternoon Of An Elf
Year: 1954
Tracks: 11
Body and Soul
Year: 1951
Tracks: 20
That's My Kick and Gemini
Year:
Tracks: 19
Dreamstreet and One World Concert
Year:
Tracks: 17
Closeup In Swing - A New Kind Of Love
Year:
Tracks: 20
One of the most typical of all pianists, Erroll Garner proved that it was possible to be a sophisticated participant without learned how to read music, that a creative jazz player can be selfsame democratic without watering mastered his euphony, and that it is possible to rest an enthusiastic player without changing one's style one time it is formed. A vivid sensation wHO sounded unlike anyone else, Erroll Garner on medium-tempo pieces often stated the flap with his left hand like a rhythm guitar while his right played chords slightly behind the beat, creating a memorable impression. His playful free form introductions (which forced his sidemen to really listen), his ability to play stunning runs without erst glancing at the keyboard, his grunting and the pure joy that he displayed spell performing were likewise part of the Erroll Garner magic.
Garner, whose older brother Linton is likewise a fine piano player, appeared on the radiocommunication with the Kan-D-Kids at the years of ten. After functional topically in Pittsburgh, he stirred to New York in 1944 and worked with Slam Stewart's triplet during 1944-45 before expiration forbidden on his own. By 1946 Garner had his level-headed together and when he backed Charlie Parker on his far-famed "Nerveless Blues" session of 1947, the piano player was already an obvious giant. His unclassifiable style had an orchestral attack straight from the sweep era just was open to the innovations of federal Bureau of Prisons. From the early '50s Garner's accessible style became very democratic and he ne'er seemed to deliver an sour day up until his forced retirement (due to unwellness) in early 1975. His makeup "Misty" became a standard. Erroll Garner, world Health Organization had the power to sit at the pianoforte without prior preparation and record three albums in unmatchable day (all colourful first takes), made many records passim his vocation for such companies as Savoy, Mercury, RCA, Dial, Columbia, EmArcy, ABC-Paramount, MGM, Reprise and his possess Octave label.
Naomi Campbell - Campbell To Face Air Rage Charges
Wednesday, 11 June 2008
Star turn
High-profile record-spinner DJ AM is heading here to help celebrate a New Zealand company which has turned the tables on the job of playing music in clubs. He talks to Dean Campbell
Adam "DJ AM" Goldstein would rather be seen rocking parties than tabloid pages, but when you date a string of Hollywood faces including Nicole Ritchie and Mandy Moore, sometimes that can't be avoided.Goldstein has appeared everywhere from the pages of NW magazine to Ashton Kutcher's Punk'd show, but as TimeOut found out, that's all a bit of a strange spin-off sideshow to the career of this 35-year-old DJ and businessman. Ahead of our phone chat, his publicist had laid out the ground rules about personal questions. So instead the talk turns to how he has managed to become one of America's most in-demand DJs."It's been a long run," he says from his home in Southern California, "I haven't had another job since '96; 12 years and this is all I've done. I've just had a nice, slow, steady incline in the amount of work."A quick check of his current schedule and you wonder whether it is possible to increase that work rate any further. AM flies on average six times a week to get from gig to gig - that's a lot of aeroplane food.
"I'm DJing my ass off," he laughs, "I've been a very, very busy man. It varies, the cities each week - Fridays it's my residency in Vegas. The past seven days I've played Denver, Atlantic City, Tampa, New York, Detroit, and I just got home and I'm going to Hong Kong tomorrow, then Sydney, before I come and see you in New Zealand." One explanation for this high-demand situation could be that he's known for dating the stars, people read about him in celebrity gossip magazines every second week and therefore he becomes a more appealing commodity to party promoters. But the guy has been DJing professionally since 1996 and he is technically very good - famed for his quick-cut mixing and scratching and his eclectic party mash-up style. You could hear anything from Kanye to Zeppelin to the latest indie rock hit or club banger in an AM set, depending on time and area code. He also speaks confidently and knowledgeably about the art of spinning tunes. "I think a key to being a good DJ - aside from technical ability - is to be unselfish. You can show up to a gig that someone has hired you for and get there and realise, 'oh my God, these people are awful', all they want to hear is Top 40 all night long, they want the same crap they've been hearing on the radio all day. And to be able to be unselfish and say 'stuff it, I'm going to give them what they want' and not go 'God, don't you people know about good music' and try to educate them, that's a key part of it. "In saying that, I love throwing people curve balls. Although sometimes that backfires and people are like 'Are you really playing this God-awful song?', then I'll do something to it, like add drums to it, or start scratching it up to make it sound better."
Adam "DJ AM" Goldstein would rather be seen rocking parties than tabloid pages, but when you date a string of Hollywood faces including Nicole Ritchie and Mandy Moore, sometimes that can't be avoided.Goldstein has appeared everywhere from the pages of NW magazine to Ashton Kutcher's Punk'd show, but as TimeOut found out, that's all a bit of a strange spin-off sideshow to the career of this 35-year-old DJ and businessman. Ahead of our phone chat, his publicist had laid out the ground rules about personal questions. So instead the talk turns to how he has managed to become one of America's most in-demand DJs."It's been a long run," he says from his home in Southern California, "I haven't had another job since '96; 12 years and this is all I've done. I've just had a nice, slow, steady incline in the amount of work."A quick check of his current schedule and you wonder whether it is possible to increase that work rate any further. AM flies on average six times a week to get from gig to gig - that's a lot of aeroplane food.
"I'm DJing my ass off," he laughs, "I've been a very, very busy man. It varies, the cities each week - Fridays it's my residency in Vegas. The past seven days I've played Denver, Atlantic City, Tampa, New York, Detroit, and I just got home and I'm going to Hong Kong tomorrow, then Sydney, before I come and see you in New Zealand." One explanation for this high-demand situation could be that he's known for dating the stars, people read about him in celebrity gossip magazines every second week and therefore he becomes a more appealing commodity to party promoters. But the guy has been DJing professionally since 1996 and he is technically very good - famed for his quick-cut mixing and scratching and his eclectic party mash-up style. You could hear anything from Kanye to Zeppelin to the latest indie rock hit or club banger in an AM set, depending on time and area code. He also speaks confidently and knowledgeably about the art of spinning tunes. "I think a key to being a good DJ - aside from technical ability - is to be unselfish. You can show up to a gig that someone has hired you for and get there and realise, 'oh my God, these people are awful', all they want to hear is Top 40 all night long, they want the same crap they've been hearing on the radio all day. And to be able to be unselfish and say 'stuff it, I'm going to give them what they want' and not go 'God, don't you people know about good music' and try to educate them, that's a key part of it. "In saying that, I love throwing people curve balls. Although sometimes that backfires and people are like 'Are you really playing this God-awful song?', then I'll do something to it, like add drums to it, or start scratching it up to make it sound better."
Wednesday, 4 June 2008
O'Neal To Go To Rehab
Latest: Oscar-winning actress Tatum O'Neal is set to enter rehab - after turning down a judge's recommendation she attend drug counseling. The former child star - who chronicled her recovery from a heroin addiction in her 2004 book A Paper Life - was arrested by police on Sunday night, after she was spotted by a narcotics team exchanging money with a man three blocks from her home in the Big Apple. According to the New York Daily News, the actress "laughed and chatted" her way through her arraignment at Manhattan Criminal Court on Monday - just hours after she tried to plead her way out of her arrest. O'Neal's lawyer refused Criminal Court Judge Felicia A. Mennin's offer for the 44-year-old actress to sit through two days of drug counseling in favour of finding a rehab programme suitable for the star. A law enforcement source says, "She's going to go to her own, high-priced, out-of-the-spotlight rehab to get clean - again." The daughter of screen star Ryan O'Neal - who, at age 10, was the youngest person ever to win an Oscar - entered no plea and was released on her own recognisance. She is next due in court on 28 July .
See Also
See Also
Saturday, 31 May 2008
Blige FFAWNs Over New Charity
Mary J. Blige is putting her money where her inspiration is.
The reformed R&B star has announced plans to launch FFAWN, the Mary J. Blige and Steve Stoute Foundation for the...
Thursday, 29 May 2008
Lydia Lunch's Teenage Jesus and The Jerks
Artist: Lydia Lunch's Teenage Jesus and The Jerks
Genre(s):
Other
Discography:
Everything
Year: 1995
Tracks: 12
Ex Home and Away star eyes new movie
Former 'Home and Away' star Melissa George is in final negotiations to star in a new supernatural thriller called 'Triangle'.
The Hollywood Reporter says that the film will be directed by 'Severance' director Christopher Smith.
The film tells the story of passengers thrown into great danger on a yachting trip.
George's character is a woman with three personalities who relives the experience through each of them.
Shooting is set to begin in Australia in April.
George was most recently seen on Irish cinema screens in '30 Days of Night'. Read the review here.
The Hollywood Reporter says that the film will be directed by 'Severance' director Christopher Smith.
The film tells the story of passengers thrown into great danger on a yachting trip.
George's character is a woman with three personalities who relives the experience through each of them.
Shooting is set to begin in Australia in April.
George was most recently seen on Irish cinema screens in '30 Days of Night'. Read the review here.
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